Looking back…

The other night, during one of our storied visits to McAllisters, Kyle and I started reading some old posts from here. Mostly ones that were from this time last year, the year before and even three years ago. We had several inches of snow on November 23, 2005, I totally forgot.

It was a bit strange honestly, looking back at years gone by, and even though it seemed like forever, three years isn’t that far back. I wonder what posts would like if I had blogged in high school. What was I thinking in November 1996? Surely there would have been something about freshman year, the girls I was dating, band practice, new friends and the excitement of the friends who had a car and could take me places! I wish that I had started blogging, or at least journaling much earlier in my life. In my younger years there was usually a notebook, a sketch pad or just a scrap of paper that I would often write things on, I wonder whatever happened to all of those? I know where some of my “note books” are, essentially composition books that I passed back and forth with girls I dated instead of tearing out paper from our notebooks. I have 2 or 3 around somewhere. Maybe I should delve into those sometime to reminisce. But I’m not sure there are any surviving “journals,” places where I wrote the kinds of things that I write here. Pieces of paper with short quips, quotes and long, drawn out prose on my life and my thoughts. The memories I have of that time are incomplete, not because I can’t remember every detail (which I can’t) but also because I’m sure there are days gone by, and thoughts that passed to quickly that I didn’t document in some way. How sad, my past is but a memory because I didn’t take the time to record it.

Looking at those posts from a few years ago I realize that life has changed and has changed me. Mostly I think it’s been for the best, but at times there I things that I miss about the past, things that I wish didn’t happen or things that shouldn’t have happened. I like where things have ended up though. I’m happy with life and where it’s taking me in the future overall.

I am grateful for the future that I have and still, at times, I mourn for the past that is no more.

Beautiful Silence…The Network is Down!

The phones have been down here at work for the last 2 days. They¬† went out around 10am yesterday and didn’t come up until after 11am today. The new highway work they are doing led to a “network issue” wherein they cut the main phone line for our business park rendering approximately 20 businesses entirely impotent. We rely on email, fax, and phone calls to do everything in our business, without it, we’re dead in the water.

How can you plan for this? We were using iPhones to check some critcal email accounts. But faxing? How can you back this up without email? How can you provide alternatives to email when most of the organization is not on smart phones or laptops? We used our cells to communicate with key customers about the issue, but still I’m sure something got dropped along the way. I’d really be interested in any thoughts you might have out there…

I enjoyed the peace of no phones ringing though, unfortunately ringing phones provide money for us and in turn a job for me.

In a fog

I’ve been trying to write this post for a long time now, since November actually. It seems that when I go out and do just about anything I’m totally in a fog to what’s going on around me. When I’m out with the guys, Erin, or just by myself. I’m totally just in my own world. Sure I particpate and interact with the world around me but at times I feel like everything is just passing me by for some reason. For example, Wednesday night I had some time to kill and I needed to eat dinner so I headed to my favorite grease pit for some chicken and noodles and some time with a good book.
I arrived, ordered some food and almost instantly the piping hot noodles and potatoes were there, I love that place for that very reason. Good cheap food, fast. After I finished my meal I started to read and enjoy a cup of coffee, black coffee, nothing foo foo about it. As I was reading I found myself totally engrossed in the story and the characters of the book. I looked at my watch after a while, still had an hour to kill, back to the book. The next thing I knew it was 10 minutes past time to leave and I had not realized that anything had happened around me. As I looked up from the book I noticed that the scene of the restaurant had changed entirely, when I had arrived the place was full of old people enjoying a quiet meal, maybe 8 other people there total. After reading though, there were at least 40 people there, the place was packed with more old people, a few families and even some single people just looking for a hot meal on a cold night. When did the scene suddenly change, where was I?
I get this feeling nearly everyday it seems. I just space out from the rest of the world most of the time and spend my days in a fog of my own thoughts. I think of the great mysteries of life, you know, the obvious ones like Who are we? Where are we going? What is Spam really made of? I just think about everything all the time. I feel like sometimes I’m missing the most important things…Those that are right in front of me.