Life or Something Close

Tuesday, March 9

i wrote part of it...

Soundtrack of my life: owsley - Uncle John's Farm -

Wander... it's a Hoosier thingI wrote something tonight that no one will ever see. One person might, but it's not likely with the way things are going right now. Why can't I just get past it all and move on? Why? Cause I don't' want to that's why! It's my life, let me screw it up how I see fit. Right now I'm trying to unscrew it up I guess, but just the same. Someday it'll work out, someday...
My apologies to my readers who have seen this go from a somewhat vague and philosophical account of life to more of a rant and rave type of blog... I just write what I'm thinking... I haven't' been thinking anything really interesting lately...
I have just 4 days left here... can't wait, maybe I can change into someone without a care in the world for just one week, maybe then I'll be ok. I've pretty much already checked out anyways, because lets face it, this is all I've been looking forward to for the last month. Only two days of work and two days of class left though.
Do you ever want to just grab someone and hug them as tight as you can and tell them that you'll fix it? I want to do that right now, and I can't, it sucks... life is becoming too closed ended again, it's about time to clean house and start fresh... everyone knows everythign adn that sucks...
I told some people that I might just go wandering during SB one day...I think it scared everyone... sometimes you just can't be funny and socialable all the time. I need time to just get away from everyone, and be alone basically, with a book, with a computer, whatever, I don't' really care, I just need to unwind and chill for a bit, I don't' always want to tell jokes and be the center of things. Sometimes I just want to be a regular guy...
I just spent the last 20 minutes fixing the pics on this site, if you find one that doesn't work let me know k? Anyways I need sleep... talk to you all later
PS my butt is still bright freaking pink, I'm going tannin again tomorrow... stupid Indiana white boy disease...